Christopher Nolan - Are you watching closely?

Before you start reading this, keep a few things in mind.

1. If you haven’t seen a single Christopher Nolan film, you might want to stay away from this piece because you might not understand the sentiments and fall asleep halfway through the piece. Continue at your own risk.
2. The idea behind the piece is not to make you like the man or his films.
3. I’m not a Nolan fanboy or a Nolan fanatic. I’m just a Nolan fan. What’s the difference, you ask? Well a fan is an avid follower not a blind devotee.
4. The views and ideas expressed here and mine and maybe that of a few other Nolan fans. You may not give a rat’s furry little ass about what is said here but that would eventually make the reading of this piece redundant.

As I write this, I have just come back from my 4th viewing of Christopher Nolan’s Inception and to quote Ellis Redding from The Sahwshank Redemption “I find I’m so excited, I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head.” But anybody who has seen and known the genius of Nolan will know what I’m talking about. As I write this, critics are hailing it as his masterpiece, audiences are loving it and the cash registers are ringing, though at $60 million, it is far from his last film, The Dark Knight which had an opening weekend collection of $158 million and collected a Billion dollars worldwide. Here in Mumbai, I have experienced things that have made me happy beyond words - people giving a standing ovation to an English film. I really can’t remember the last time I heard so many OH FUCKs and OH SHITs during any film. I can’t remember the last time I heard so many furious discussions as I left the movie theatre. Discussions, mind you, not proclamations. And yet I find a lot of people calling it an over-hyped film, unnecessarily complicated film, emotionally weak film, action-heavy film. That’s fine. Opinions are like assholes, everybody’s got one – and I don’t mean that in a disrespectful way. Cinema or any art form, for that matter, divides people as much as it unites them. For someone who loves and lives hip-hop, I have pretty much come to accept the fact that different people will have different choices and opinions.

It’s nice to see that people are appreciating a cerebral film like Inception. Some might consider the word ‘cerebral’ debatable but what else would you call a film that enters a person’s mind? After films like The Matrix (1999), Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004) and Slipstream (2007), it can’t be called a totally original idea. In a time where there is almost nothing new to do, just new ways of doing things, Nolan has managed to create a new world and successfully lure the viewer into it. Where most filmmakers will show you what’s happening, Nolan manages to make things happen to you. To paraphrase Nolan himself,

“I always find myself gravitating to the analogy of a maze. If you picture the story as a maze, you don’t want to be hanging above the maze watching the characters make the wrong choices because it’s frustrating. You actually want to be in the maze with them, making the turns with them. I quite like to be in that maze.”

With Inception, Nolan does to you what he’s doing to the characters in the film. He puts you in a maze and lets you navigate your way. With The Prestige (2006), he tells the story of 2 rival magicians who entertain people by often misguiding them and as you watch the film, you realize that Nolan is doing the same to you. He doesn’t merely show you a new world; he brings you into it and then takes you on a journey like never before. But he is careful to show you only what he wants to show you and the way he wants you to see it. A reviewer put it best when he said that Nolan is like a Grandmaster who can see 10 moves ahead of you.

The acting, the visuals, the action, the music; all are top notch. But what stands out for me in the film is the story. Anybody who likes Nolan will tell you that he is a great story writer and an even better storyteller. For me, the rise of Nolan is truly the return of the single most important element in cinema – the story. You can simply read a Nolan screenplay and realize that it can be turned into a great film. Which is the reason why even people who generally stay away from Sci-Fi as a genre, have liked the film. The Matrix was a milestone because apart from Sci-Fi lovers, it managed to attract a lot of people who thought of Sci-Fi as something that won’t appeal to them. Inception will do the same, even if on a smaller scale. Because behind all the technology, machines, androids and aliens, a classic Sci-Fi film will reveal more about humanity and being human than any family drama ever can.

The only thing that I feel was lacking, and I realized it quite late, was that in a film that deals with dreams, there was no sex. Any human being, who has dreamed, has dreamed of sex. Not to mention, what happens if a child is born in a dream? Maybe too much to ask for in a single film. I’m sure that in the 8 years that it took to write the film, Nolan must have considered and discarded the idea for a reason!

I first discovered the world of Christopher Nolan on a winter night in November 2006 when I sat down to watch The Prestige. I had heard about this cult-classic called Memento (2000) and the resurrection of the caped crusader with Batman Begins (2005) but never really got to watching either of them. I had just begun to discover Hollywood movies and I had too many classics to catch up with. But the trailer for The Prestige totally grabbed me from the first time I saw it. I have seen the trailer more times than the number of films I have seen till date. As the film ended and the credits began rolling with Thom Yorke singing in the background, I knew I had discovered two British gems, Christopher Nolan and Radiohead (which happens to be Nolan’s favourite band). I also realized that I had finished atleast 10 Ultra Milds in the process. Armed with more cigarettes, I watched the film again. And again. After watching it for the third time, I realized that the film had raised more questions than it had with the first viewing. Obviously, I didn’t get any sleep for the remainder of that night. For the next month or so, I recommended it to as many people as I could and watched it a few more times. I was hooked. I followed it up with Memento, Batman Begins, Following and Insomnia. Though The Prestige remains my favourite Nolan film till date, each and every film gave me something to think about. The one that is my least favourite is the only one he did not write – Insomnia (2002), not to say that it’s a bad film. His films demand and certainly reward the viewer's attention. Like Alfred Borden in The Prestige would say, "Are you watching closely?"

I am yet to meet a person who has watched his films and disliked any one. They may like one more than the other but there’s always something to take away from every Nolan film. Every Nolan fan has one film that blew his mind and they will watch every film that he ever makes for the rest of his career hoping and praying that he can make a better one. That is where the disappointment stems from. Every time, I watch a Nolan film I secretly hope that the film turns to be better than The Prestige. It may be The Dark Knight for some and Memento for others but I guess the sentiment is the same. And just to clarify, I don’t feel the same for any other director. Ask anybody about David Fincher, they will tell you that he’s the guy who directed Fight Club (1999) and Se7en (1997), Sam Mendes will always be the guy who directed American Beauty (1999) and Andy and Larry Wachowski will always be the guys who gave us The Matrix (1999). You ask people who Christopher Nolan is and you will get very different answers. Ask them about the one Nolan film you dislike and there will be a long pause followed by “I don’t really dislike any Nolan film but...”

There are other filmmakers like Martin Scorcese, Steven Spielberg or Stanley Kubrick who might generate varied responses but their films have been around for almost 30 to 40 years while Nolan has been around for 10. The only present-day director who comes close is Quentin Tarantino. Both Tarantino and Nolan make strange casting choices that seem to work, don’t believe in churning out films by the dozen and both write their own films. An interesting parallel is that my least favourite Tarantino film is the one that is not his original screenplay – Jackie Brown (1997). Nobody writes conversations and displays style and class like Tarantino but as an overall filmmaker, I’d still go for Nolan.

The fact that he is a recluse, always wears a suit no matter where he’s shooting, never uses a second unit director, dislikes and avoids CGI, never explains his films and is extremely humble; just add to his allure and enigma. Like the character of Neo in The Matrix, he is an anomaly of sorts in today’s world and for that very reason, I believe that he is The One.

But at the end of it, after all my hosannas, you may not like his film(s) or his filmmaking. And nobody explains it better than Nolan himself,

“Films are subjective – what you like, what you don’t like. But every time I go to the cinema and pay my money and sit down and watch a film go up on the big screen, I want to feel that the people who made this film feel that it’s the best movie in the world, that they poured everything into it. Whether or not I agree with what they’ve done, I want that effort there. I want that sincerity. And when I don’t feel it, that’s the only time I feel like I’m wasting my time at the movies”

Amen to that.

Rann Ramu, Rann!

or How I learned to stop expecting and be indifferent!
(This time, it’s personal)

As a Christian, I am supposed to believe that Christ lived and suffered for the sins of mankind and was eventually crucified and resurrected. Well, I don’t but that’s another story. My point is that I might not believe in the resurrection of Jesus but I am an optimistic person and there are a few resurrections that I have been waiting for. The first and the most important one is that of Sachin Tendulkar. I will die a peaceful man if I can witness Sachin return to his sparkling form and help India win the World Cup. Now before you haters start saying anything, I would like to present a crude but effective reply in anticipation – Fuck you!

The second would be that of one my favourite singers of all time – George Michael. Now, once again before you say something about the 'has-been gay singer who was arrested at a public loo for indecent exposure' I would like to say that he is a brilliant songwriter and an even better singer. Too bad if all that you remember of him is “Last Christmas” and “Careless Whisper”. That’s like remembering Rahman for “Jai Ho” and “Ringa Ringa Ringa”. I didn’t even know how bad it was till I saw Music & Lyrics (2007). If you have a film where Hugh Grant plays you, you know you fucked up somewhere . . .real bad!

The third was the resurrection of a man who single-handedly created and then ruined the genre of Bollywood-Underworld films. Ram Gopal Verma’s list of good films is really enviable and that is probably why people still put money into his films and even try to watch his films. While most people consider Satya (1998) as his best, I would go for the more refined and hence underappreciated Company (2002). That’s not a debate I want to get into right now. That requires time, patience and a lot of booze so if you have all three, let’s meet up soon. His Sarkar (2005) was an extremely good take on The Godfather. His Rangeela (1995) is legendary for many reasons – Rahman’s first Hindi film, the raunchy launch of Urmila, Aamir’s brilliant performance and the advent of his award-shunning etc. His Raat (1992) is, in my humble opinion, one of the scariest horror films this country has produced. Shiva (1989) was a crackling debut that was never appreciated at the time but has now gathered a cult following. There are a few honorable mentions too like Jungle (2000), Kaun (1999) and even Naach (2004). The last time Ramu made something that didn’t make you want to throw up was Sarkar Raaj (2008). Don’t get me wrong, it was a disappointment after Sarkar but still, it was bearable and decent.



These days, the consistency of Ramu lies in the way he consistently disappoints. His films after Sarkar can be divided into two categories – One where he says “Come here, I’m going to take a dump on you” and the other where he lures you with the promise of cake. You go along because of the beautiful icing and the baker’s reputation in the good ol’ days. It’s only when you bite into a piece that you realize that it’s filled with all the shit that he couldn’t drop on you from his previous films. All Ramu fans have fallen for atleast one film from either of the categories. I know I have.

These days I go for a Ramu film saying “Come on, how bad can it be?” and every time Ramu manages to quietly say “That’s how bad!”. When I heard that Ishqiya and Rann were clashing on the 29th of Jan, only out of respect to Ramu, I had to pretend to decide which one I would watch first. Though Ishqiya was also a major disappointment, I had no idea what Rann had in store for me. I watched it last night and I have come very close to giving up on Ramu.

When I first saw the critics’ comments on the cover of Mumbai Mirror, I got that sinking feeling. Subhash K Jha had claimed it was Ramu’s best film since Company and he was on the top of the list with 4 or 4.5 stars. Any list with that name on top is trying to con you into one big crap-fest.

I felt like Ramu was trying to do a Bhandarkar-style commentary meets Aamir Khan-message film and ended up achieving neither. I guess the DoP decided to take most of the days off leaving the camera in the hands of Ramu who soon realized that tripods and trolleys are expensive whereas weed is cheap. The camera movements can put Sunny Deol to shame. His Epidermis-exposing extreme close-ups in Sarkar still went with the intensity of the film but in Rann he just said “How can I distract my viewers from the predictable story, mediocre acting and pathetic writing? Aha, I’ll just go crazy with the camera!” And then, he did. Sudeep, unlike popular opinion, gave a bad performance with his US-returned character and strong South-Indian accent. Both Gul Panag and Neetu Chandra were terribly miscast. Neetu Chandra who does nothing but wear skimpy clothes that reveal her ample self, especially took the cake towards the end. There is a moment where she has to give an utterly shocked expression and she tries to get it right but making her eyeballs seem bigger than her boobs. No way is that happening anytime soon! Paresh Rawal does something that he has been doing forever – another crappy villainous role for the money. It’s ok, I understand. A man’s gotta eat! Rajat Kapoor was again terribly wasted. Ritesh was just about bearable and Mohnish Behl starts off well till he breaks into the “Let-me-reveal-my-devious-plot-in-case-somebody-might-be-recording” speech. Amitabh is the only saving grace again and that too because the rest of the cast is so bad. With a few good actors in the equation, he would have to step-up his game up to stay in the fray. One thing that stands out, for me, are the songs of the film. There are many reasons to put songs in any film. Great lyrics lying around, great music lying around, promoting your not-so-hot muse, getting eyeballs through hot item number, just to break the monotony of the narrative. With this film, Ramu has come up with a new one – to fuck up an already bad film. Each and every song is so bad that I’m at a loss for words. The lyrics seem like they were written through a vox-pop on the streets of Delhi. All in all, a truly disgusting experience so much so that I have almost given up on Ramu . . . almost.

Unlike Jesus who suffered for his people, died and was eventually resurrected, it is we the audience who are suffering through his films, wishing we were dead and yet hoping to witness the resurrection of a man who was once a God.

Highly unlikely but if Ramu is reading this . . . Sorry if you feel hurt but there is a lot of love and respect behind this ruthless criticism and more importantly like Munna said “Apun public hai. Kissi ko kuch bhi bol sakta hai!” So for Christ’s sake, don’t disappoint with Rakta Charitra (2010)

Story of my life!

One of my favourite films of all time is Charlie Kaufman’s Adaptation (2002). Though the film was directed by Spike Jonze of Being John Malkovich fame, I would still call it Kaufman’s film. Nicholas Cage walked away with just an Oscar nomination where he should have won his second Oscar for Best Actor (after the brilliant Leaving Las Vegas). For those who have no idea what I’m talking about, please go watch the film once you’re done reading this. Hell, I’ll even lend it to you.

Anyway, the story goes that after the success of Being John Malkovich (1999), Kaufman began to write a screenplay adapted from a book but just couldn’t turn the fabulous book into a decent film. So what does he do? He writes this film about the writer Charlie Kaufman trying to adapt a book into a film. A classic case of turning inability into an opportunity. Anyway, what ensues is too complicated to explain. I couldn’t if I wanted to.

Well, coming to the point, I just wonder how these writers think. There comes a time in all our lives when we watch movie or read a book and say “How do people come up with this stuff?” Well, I’ve pondered over that question many times. What follows is a statement - “I could never think of something like that” and then the question - “Or can I?” The answer to that question can either change your life for the better or reveal just one more beautiful thing that you suck at. The question troubled me quite a few times but I was too busy creating a fool of myself in some major areas of life to realize that I couldn’t write worth shit. As time passed by and I saw more and more people writing, I felt like the time has come to give it a shot. The final nail in the coffin, however, was in the form of a film poster. The film in question was YRF’s Pyaar Impossible (2009) and the piece of information that grabbed my balls and thrust them into the meat grinder was “Written by Uday Chopra”. I said to myself “If this doesn’t put you pen to the pad, nothing will”.

Armed with an introductory chapter from Syd Field’s book and a low self-esteem (many thanks to the poster), I set out like Frodo heading into the dark lands of Morodor. Little did I know that I would be beaten to a pulp before I even got out of the Shire. What happened? I had an interesting character in mind. I knew the kind of story that I wanted to write. The atmosphere was set. I had it all. And then I asked the all important question – “So this is my main character, now what happens to him?” And that’s where it all came crumbling down. I just realized that I had everything but a story.

How do people write a story? Do they start with an interesting character in mind or do they have a defining action around which the story revolves or do they have a major conflict to start with? Thanks to Syd Field and extensive reading about films and screenplays, I can atleast list out all the things that were missing from my endeavour. This list ran into a few days and then suddenly something struck me - If every story or screenplay that I liked seemed beyond my realm of imagination, would anything that strikes me make for a good story? And if it doesn’t interest me, would anybody else be interested in it?

American Beauty (1999) has one of my favourite lines in a film – “It's a great thing when you realize you still have the ability to surprise yourself.” And I think that is what a good story is all about. The story must be able to surprise the writer – “Shit! Did I just write that?” Once the writer thinks that his story is so good that he can scarcely believe that he came up with it, then half the job is done. Then it’s upto the audience and as far as they are concerned you never know what’s going to happen. But, if nothing else, you are left with a story that atleast you’re proud of. And for people like me, and Uday, that is good enough.

So with renewed self-confidence and morning-show tickets to “Pyaar Impossible”, I promise to try. Try till I succeed or atleast till I get tired of humiliating myself.